A new year is upon us, a new time ahead of us. A time of recollection, restructure, and resolution!
At least, that's what some people tell themselves. I can't say I found "New Years Day" to be exactly that, but then I don't see a lot of things. None the less, a pox on the whole affair. Never has it been so widely embraced by so many that so few promises should be kept, and embraced with a mighty yawp at that. We act as though each year is a film that ends, giving you an opportunity to pitch a new screenplay. Completely baseless vows can now be made scrutiny free. Regrettably, the only changes that really seem to occur are of a less virtuous variety, namely that of the blatant lie. Not to others per se, but on a much more criminal scale. No, we lie to ourselves.
This year I'm going to do those things I quite clearly, specifically do not subscribe to. This year is going to be different. This year I'm going to be different, we say. We say. And it having been said, gives way to the traditional echo of years long past. So enamored with looking forward are we that we often forget to look to the past and remember those many MANY broken promises made to no one in particular. And on the off chance a promise of change is kept, one has to wonder just where the drive for that change came from. Can it even be said that it was a conscious effort when it's so bloody a la mode to make these outlandish claims annually? Ask yourself, was that change for you, or for the sake of calendar squares? Was it not a change you could have made any day of the week? And if so, why haven't you?
I'll tell you why. It's because that hideously idealistic vision you've spent your whole life painting is the last fucking thing you want. There are no twirled moustaches hatching schemes to derail your preferred development. The only thing stopping you is ultimately you and that, my friends, belies your hopeful yawp amid the chorus of promise. From where I'm standing, it seems to me that this holidays foundations lie less in the realm of change, and more in the realm of absolution, specifically of years lived horribly. Past transgressions completely forgotten only to be replaced by eerily similar ones.
I don't know why some people do this. Maybe the self deceit runs deep and they're just going through the motions. Maybe they're afraid, not of failing, but of succeeding at being the best version of themselves. That's really not for me to decide. If you're dead set on making empty promises though, promise me next New Years Eve that you'll remember every good choice you didn't make, and how nothing stopped you from making them.
As to you lot with integrity, I tip my hat to you, and apologize if you in any way felt painted with the same brush as those I mentioned previously. That really wasn't my intention and I am aware not all are as I've described. If you still feel upset by my ramblings in a week or two, please feel free to write down your thoughts on the matter and then put them in a drawer and leave them there. Forever.
Happy Whatever The Fuck, world. I'm out.
